Frank Mitchell

Sparks

Slow, slow, slow, slow
Don’t want to take
Things way too fast

Sparks burn white bright
And then they’re gone
Leave you holding ashes

Detachment is the essence
How do you cup
Fire in my hands

Between fingers light escapes
Dance through the darkness
Slow, slow, slow, slow

Conversations

3 December 2004

“Interesting…I always find myself trying to decipher the true meaning of these. What real life event incited such writing? I always like the nods to Thief that pop up here and there. As it stands Balance is desireable, but it has great costs.

I myself lived detached for a long time, and there were times I would say I was balanced. Yet, when she found me, suddenly Balance didn’t matter. She mattered. Only her. Everything I’d ever wanted. Everything I’d ever need. The only thing I found in being slow and in darkness was lonliness. Though the thief life style does have some lessons to teach us…when you find something precious shimmering in the dark…take it…make it yours.”

Ben Ulmen

Good point, that the life of the thief is a lonely one. I’d have to agree with you there, though it’s a life that once embraced is not so easily cast away. Well, I find it damn hard to give up anyway. Oh, not that I’m trying terribly hard or anything like that, but every once in a while I catch myself wishing that I wasn’t so obsessed with darkness.

Maybe it fosters a life that’s more alone than lonely. I find a romantic aspect in solitude, silence, shadows, secrets. I value my autonomy, and I think that’s what I draw from the thief archetype.

Origins of poetry, however, are different questions. The title, “Sparks”, is a blatantly obvious reference to Sarah’s name, Sarah Park. The fire connections flowed naturally from there. One function of fire is to illuminate the world around it, a world normally cloaked in darkness. We see new things when we’re offered the world through someone else’s eyes.

Slow is how life feels when she’s around. There’s nothing rushed, or strained, or tense about our relationship. Lots of energy there, yes, but it crackles and sparks without needing release or an outlet. A slow burn that’s a gentle reminder that life doesn’t have to be a whirlwind.

6 December 2004

“Now that makes all that much more sense. With that in mind it changes my original perception of things. I had at first thought things with her were going to fast for you, but now on the re-read it is clearer to me.

Speaksie of thiefsie…and weavers was…you know the song "Hunter” by Dido. Something about that song. I always think of it in a Thief reference…strange how with some songs that happens to me. It changes the entire meaning of some. More often then not changes the mood. I only mention this one because I was listening to it not some thirty minutes ago, and it is running through my head.

I suppose this exchange is all too easy to track back…although originally it could have gone in another direction. I think we may have to rethink our system though…Thief, God, and Sex doesn’t seem to fit for me anymore… Thief, God, and Relationships makes more sense to me. Even if it is about sex that can be tracked back to relationships between people. As of late I have missed our intellectual tete-a-tetes. So as it stands I will be adding your website to my daily internet regimen, amongst a constantly growing army of webcomics I must read.“

Ben Ulmen

I miss our conversations too. Fortunately, I’ll be home in two weeks, and they can resume then. Yay!

Yeah, Thief, God, and Sex doesn’t fit for me either. I like Relationships, though I’m starting to think that Connections might be a broader fit. Have to think some more on that one. It’s like Thief symbolizes the internal, God symbolizes the external, and there’s connections and parallels and links that get established between me and the world around me. Some of them are physical, some are emotional, some are intellectual, and some are undefined. Yet there’s defiantly a necessity in my life for person-to-person contact.

And of course that makes me feel like an atrocious friend for not keeping up on our communications, because God only knows they’ve been too few and far between. Going to have to work on that. Yet even a dialogue such as this one is a poor substitute for the amount of information that’s exchanged when we’re face to face. Video conference maybe? Though as I find myself spending more and more time on my computer, I’m realizing that physical interaction in the real world is important. Very important.

8 December 2004

"You needn’t be concerned…I didn’t do much to keep up either. Realizing this I started up this exchange. I don’t know if I could pull off a video conference. I have the hardware I believe. Probably should wait until I move in with Christy as there is high speed internet there. Yay!

Yes the computer can definately suck you in and alienate you from ‘real people’. Though I find TV to much more annoying. A minor point of tension once with me and Christy…okay, not really. I said, ‘You know I don’t like TV all that much?’ ‘I know, it just helps me unwind.’ Can’t remember much else of the conversation, but then we started reading that book and that’s another way to unwind. Yesterday was the first time we’d watched TV in a almost a week. Kinda nice. Yesterday I felt like watching TV as well so yeah.”

Ben Ulmen

TV is a brain killer. I don’t feel the same about movies though. Maybe it’s all the materialistic advertising that accompanies TV shows. Or perhaps it’s just that most of what’s on TV right now has zero plot development or character engagement. It’d be interesting to see what an EKG scan of someone watching TV looked like. How much of your brain shuts down when you’re watching TV?

In an effort to avoid the whole “TV eats my soul” thing we’ve been playing a lot of board games as of late. Yatzee and Phase 10 are popular ones. We’ll probably play Clue over this weekend, and I’ve been looking for Ricochet Robot. If you happen to see it while you’re out Christmas shopping, let me know. I know there’s an online version, but you can’t cram eight people round a computer screen. If we hooked it up to the TV though…